Close Encounters of the Celebrity Kind...
Catching Up with Queer Eye's Ted Allen
Expanded Edition of 9-28-07 WCT Interview
by Richard Knight, Jr.
Allen in casual mode, the DVD cover of his new series and with his Fab Five Queer Eye Co-horts
Catching up with an acquaintance years ago I asked her about another mutual acquaintance of ours that I hadn’t seen in awhile:
Ted Allen.  “Oh he’s in the running to be the food and wine expert for this new show on Bravo,” Kate said, “Believe it or not, it’s
called ‘Queer Eye for the Straight Guy.’”  The phenomenal success of “Queer Eye” and its five openly gay hosts (aka The Fab Five)
has been well documented.  For Allen, who was a longtime Chicago resident and one time senior editor and restaurant critic for
Chicago magazine, it meant a move to New York (with his longtime partner Barry), and continued successes.  Allen is one of the
judges on two reality programs, “Iron Chef America” and “Top Chef” (whose next season will shoot in Chicago), acts as a spokesman
for Robert Mondavi Private Selection Wines, and is the author of “The Food You Want to Eat,” a cookbook.  In addition, Allen is host
of a new PBS six part series, “Uncorked: Wine Made Simple” that explores the world’s most “storied beverage.”  The series has just
come to DVD (on three separate discs or
as a boxed set) and may return for another season.  After Allen and I caught up for a bit
we discussed “Uncorked,” the upcoming last season of “Queer Eye” and a few other items from his overflowing dance card.

Highlights from our interview:


WINDY CITY TIMES (WCT):  Tell me about “Uncorked: Wine Made Simple.”

TED ALLEN (TA):  It’s basically “Wine 101,” an introduction to how wine is made, a little bit of interesting history and talking about
how to taste it, how to pair it with food, how to enjoy it and not be overwhelmed by it.  What I’ve always been interested in with
everything from “Queer Eye” to “Top Chef” and any of these shows that I get to work on is trying to demystify complicated stuff like
wine and fancy food and encourage people to have a good time with it.

WCT:  For someone whose beverage of choice is Dr. Pepper—

TA:  Which I think is delicious.

WCT:  Me too.  I’m a total neophyte when it comes to wine.  So, a couple of things I’ve always wondered about – like, really, how
long can wine really last?  For example, could I still drink a bottle of wine that went down on the Titanic?

TA:  It all depends on the kind of wine.  I should say first of all that 99% of the wine that’s sold in the States is intended to be drunk
right away so most of us are never going to need to bother worrying about aging wine or when the right time is to drink a wine.  But
to answer your question about a wine that went down with the Titanic: the corks in a bottle of wine tend to give way.  I think
something like 8% of every wine that gets made the cork goes bad and the wine gets spoiled.  If you store wine for 25 years or so
the chances of that cork giving way are really high and if you put that wine miles and miles under the ocean I would have to guess
the chances are even higher (laughs).

WCT:  Are friends and family just terrified when they try to make dinner for you?

TA:  That’s a good question.  Most of my friends are not because we all cook together and we’ve all cooked together for a long time
and I know that I’m not really that much better of a cook than they are.  But my mom is intimidated which really bothers me.  
Whenever I go home she feels the need to try to make this multi-course, fancy thing and she’s visibly nervous in the kitchen and I’
m like, “What are you doing?”

WCT:  Well what kind of food did you grow up with?  Was it the basics like casseroles or fancier?

TA:  I grew up eating totally normal American Midwestern food like everybody else and it was never fancy.  My family is not formal at
all but my mom sees me talking about truffles and fancy wines and stuff and then when I come home she gets nervous.  It’s weird
how a semi-cable level celebrity can make people behave strangely but in a way I understand it.  Barry (Allen’s partner) and I were
walking down Seventh Avenue and we ran into (renowned New York chef) Bobby Flay and his wife, actress Stephanie March who we
lived across the street from for awhile and Barry said, “Hey, why don’t you guys come over and we’ll make you dinner?” and I was
like, “What the fuck!?!  You invited Bobby Flay to dinner at OUR HOUSE!!”  I mean, I would be terrified.  If you are in that situation
where your friend is a nationally renowned celebrity chef like Mario Vitali my suggestion would be cook something simple like ribs or
do a big ole roast and potatoes and he’ll probably be much happier than if you try to do something complicated.

WCT:  Not when you have all those pots and pans to clean.  Switching tracks for a moment, I found your comments in the recent New
York magazine story on how disposable reality stars are quite interesting.

TA:  The essential difference between “reality stars” and the Fab Five on “Queer Eye” is that we were hosts of the show as opposed
to being contestants.  There are two things going on with that.  One is that all five of us were every single of the 100 episodes we
made and we don’t get voted off the island.  The other thing is that when you’re the hosts of the show the network has no
percentage in ever making you look stupid.  They wanted us to look like gay superheroes.  Some of the things made us look a little
stupid but it’s not like someone who goes onto “Top Chef” and crashes and burns because they got stoned and stole food and
sabotaged their competition.  It’s a totally different animal.

WCT:  Are you ever prepped by producers when you do those shows to try and help make those “accidents” happen?  Are you told to
make it harder on certain contestants?

TA:  No they would never do that.  I know a lot of viewers suspect that these shows are rigged and that the producers tell us what to
do.  They’re actually are laws about competition shows that keep the producers playing by the book.  While they are allowed to
influence the outcome if they want to I’ve never seen them do it.  They tend to leave the judging up to Tom (Colicchio) and Padma
(Lakshmi) and Gail (Simmons), and myself.

WCT:  That’s good to know.

TA:  Yes but sometimes we have to make some decisions that are really hard for us.  Recently we had to vote off a popular
contestant that we liked – Trey – a really nice guy that we thought might make it all the way to the end but he screwed up.

WCT:  Uh-oh, a bad crème brulee huh?

TA:  Not that but a bad bread pudding and a bad salmon dish.  I often use a baseball metaphor but since we’re talking to the gays
today (laughs) let’s go with figure skating and say that if Johnny Weir wins every single competition and goes all the way to the
nationals but if Tonya Harding smacks his knee before the final competition he’s out.

WCT:  Good analogy, Ted.

TA:  It’s a bit of a stretch (laughs).

WCT:  Okay, back to Fab Five.  We’re counting down to the finale, the final episodes, right?

TA:  Yes, we have ten never seen episodes that will comprise our finale season including one that is a very, very campy, over the top
pageant.  It’s the opening episode which I think is November 1 and you’re going to see a whole bunch of our favorite straight guys
from the past come together in a delightful show that will feature us doing musical numbers and we actually have choreography – it’s
appalling.

WCT:  That sounds like fun.

TA:  I’m excited about it.  We shot that a year ago June and while I still see my guys I don’t see them every day the way I used to
so I’ve forgotten all about these episodes.  I have no idea what happens in them so I can’t wait to see how they turn out.

WCT:  So what’s next in your plan for domination of the food and beverage industry?

TA:  Well let’s see, we have the finale of “Top Chef 3” coming up on October 3rd in good old Chicago.  We’ve shot the finale but we’
re unveiling the winner live from Chicago.  That’s going to be fun and then we go right into shooting “Top Chef” season four which
takes place in Chicago.

WCT:  So you’ll be here a lot?

TA:  Yes and I’m so excited because this has been a record year for Chicago restaurants.  It’s a great city for them to do “Top Chef”
in and I’m thrilled.

WCT:  What’s the first thing you’ll probably do when you come back to your old stomping grounds?

TA:  I literally just got home from Chicago yesterday.  I was there for a wedding.  I always drive by my old houses in Lakeview and
Edgewater and Rogers Park to see if they’re keeping up with the weeding which they are not (laughs).

WCT:  You and Bette Midler, the queen of composting, have to get out here.

TA:  I know, right?  We stayed with our friends Roger and Bill in Boystown and probably my most favorite thing that we did on this
last visit was walk through Boystown and see that everything looks gorgeous and stop in at Unabridged which is my favorite book
store.  I’m usually to be found lurking in their dirty book section (laughs).

WCT:  Now that you’re one of the relatively few gay celebrities do you feel any of that tabloid backlash like you have to be careful
about your public behavior?

TA:  We’re just on cable so the level of scrutiny is pretty easy to live with but it is true that – especially if I’m talking to somebody
who works for something like Gawker.com – some of those guys will really go for the jugular and you have to watch it.  Also, I don’t
think I’d want to see a gossip item talking about how I was just emerging from the Ram.  That could be a little embarrassing.

WCT:  Being part of such an overtly gay show do you feel like a spokesperson for our community?  Is it a role that’s been forced on
you?

TA:  I think that there are a lot of other people who are much more responsible and who have worked a lot harder as activists to talk
about serious stuff in the gay community but one of the nicest things that’s happened as a result of “Queer Eye” is the letters we get
from gay kids and we get thousands and thousands of them talking about how having openly gay people on television has made it
easier for them to come out to their parents.  And lots of straight people liked “Queer Eye,” too and I think that’s only good.  There
were always the conservative queens in their blue blazers complaining that we were perpetuating stereotypes and I’m like, “Oh, get
over yourself.”

WCT:  Because some of the stereotyping just happens to be true.

TA:  Well, yes, I mean we weren’t playing characters.  Carson was playing Carson, I was playing me.  If we were really going to
perpetuate stereotypes we would’ve needed a florist and a flight attendant.

WCT:  (laughs)  Ooooh Mary, this is sounding good!

TA:  And a figure skater (laughs).

WCT:  Okay, so when you go on these tours – because you’re always going on tour with something you’re promoting – have you
ever had an incident where someone’s come up and thrown anti-gay crap at you?

TA:  I’ve had a couple of people yell “faggot” or something across the street but I don’t even know that’s because they recognize
me.  It’s weird.  During the whole life of the show people have only said nice things and I think that’s probably because if you’re
some hard right nut ball and you hate the gays, you probably just grit your teeth and keep walking.  I was worried about that; I was
afraid people would throw stones but it hasn’t happened.

WCT:  I can see where that would be a concern.  Okay, last question: did you ever think when you were working at Lerner
Newspapers on Belmont Avenue your career would scale such impressive heights?

TA:  Well to the extent that it has, I’m very grateful.  I had a lot of fun working for Lerner on Belmont.  I look back on that job really
fondly.